Testimony Tuesdays: 06/21/11

First off, we're horrible with series, so we shall see if this one lasts long lolol.

Many of you may not that I recently graduated with a Bachelor's degree in May and have been searching for a job, in addition to just.. learning so many lessons and growing up; a little too fast if you ask me lololol. Reality has SMACKED ME IN THE FACE SOMETHIN' GOOD!

I know that many of our viewers are college students so I just wanted to take time today to just kind of share...my lessons I'm learning now that I'm transitioning from college life to the real world, among other things(I had another blog to do this on, but it became too much to manage all the diff. blogs).

When I first decided to become a teacher, I was really burdened with teaching in inner-city schools. I was privileged to go to some very good schools and be in great programs that pushed me to new heights, but every week (in high school), I saw that my school bus passed many of the lower-income homes to go to my school which was a good 20 mins away, and those kids who theoretically should have been headed to school with me, were sent to a closer school, with a high African American and low socioeconomic status population. It puzzled me so much and made me mad. 

You don't have to go too far to see that the concept "gerrymandering" is still used in today's society, for other reasons than politics. Pair that with national statistics of how the public school system is downright failing African American and other minority students, and you've got my heart, on a platter. 

So off I went to college, determined to be trained as a teacher to make a change. I had several internships experiences at great school with perfect kids, perfect communities and perfect resources. I didn't realize that, until I had the opportunity to visit in other schools with high African American populations and high low socioeconomic status populations. *GASP*. You know, I had a clue that it was bad, but with my faith in education, I really couldn't believe how different these schools were in comparison to others I had been in. ("Inner city schools" often have the least experienced teachers, highest teacher turnover rate, lowest standardized test scores, tension and stress, many behavior issues, few technological resources, etc.)  Many times, they were only a few miles apart. It literally brought me to tears and still easily makes me angry.

FAST FORWARD: For awhile, I forgot about my burden for why I wanted to teach. I convinced myself that I would never work in unsatisfactory schools because I didn't want to subject myself to failure that is often seen in schools, that in turn, fails our kids. I figured I would just ignore it for awhile, and then maybe in 10 years, once I had built my teaching portfolio, I would begin teaching in inner city schools.

However, God has really been working on my heart. One thing has led to another and I am so excited with where God is leading me as far as job searching goes right now. He's had to break me down, remind me of why I wanted to be a teacher, and really work on my heart. At first, I cried because it seemed as though all of my plans were falling apart. I've had my career life solidly planned out, for the past 2 years. I've had to swallow the big pill called pride and really humble myself to see where He is leading me.

And I know that the way things are working out for me is not a coincidence. I have reaffirmed my reason for wanting to be a teacher and am aimed with the mentality and willpower to find a school that I can get in and be the change that children, especially African American and children of low income homes needs to see. I know it's going to be tough, but the things that children go through, especially what "children of poverty" go through is heartbreaking. Someone needs to be the stability, rolemodel, etc. in their lives and push them to want to live a life to change there circumstances.

I'm so easily reminded of the story of Jonah, running away from God because he didn't want to go to Nineveh. He was headed to Tarshish to escape, when God sent a great fish to swallow him up. After having that time in the fish's tummy to think, he decided to go to Nineveh.

I have NO time to end up being in a whale... whether figuratively or literally lol. It's best to really submit yourself to God's will for your life, rather than fight it and end up being miserable in a place you though you wanted to be.

If you have a testimony that you want to share, feel free to send it to jameka@prettynaturaldivas.com and it will go up on Tuesdays!